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New Year's Resolutions That Have Nothing to Do with Losing Weight

Dec 31, 2013

Searching my blog for past New Year's posts just now made me realize that I possibly have a fear of making new year's resolutions. Here's a quick review:

2008: I wrote my very first blog post about writing a blog. I have no recollection about resolutions or even New Year's antics after that so I assume I resolved to write more. Which I did!

2009: I recounted the most epic snowball fight I've ever been involved in but didn't come up with serious resolutions after that. I think we were still snowed in and I remember getting the swine flu twice that season, so maybe I was just resolving to stay alive?

Here's what I "resolved" to do in 2010:
  • Buy more Aveda products.
  • Flatten stomach.
  • Work on zingy comebacks to be used on jerky boys.
  • Brush up on Spanish.
  • Eat more chocolate.
I think I took care of all the important ones in 2010, read: spending money and eating more chocolate. Go me!

P.S. That New Yea'rs Eve is the reason I don't go out for New Year's Eve anymore.

2010: I sprained my ankle that year, which would eventually cause me to snowball into eating more chocolate and doing nothing else for the next two years. Lesson learned: If you're going to be lazy, you can't eat whatever you want. You have to pick one. Lazy or eat whatever you want. Can't have both.

I sort of resolved to get back in to running and get a t-shirt from a race. I did get back in to running but did not get a t-shirt. In fact, the only race I ever ran was in 2010. Getting back in to running caused all kinds of worse problems for my ankle, which would eventually cause me to snowball into plantar fasciitis, which is one of those words like "gout" that sounds a lot grosser than it is but is even more painful. Lots of complaining, one surgery and six weeks of physical therapy still hurts. A lot.

Lesson learned: Running's not for everyone, and surgery doesn't necessarily fix anything but rather may just re-distribute the pain to other areas of your body.

I had pretty much set myself up for failure that year. I think this is when my resolutionizing began its decline.

2011: In December I moved out of the 13-year friend zone with a dude who decided to move us into the never-talking-again zone a month later and was devastated-ish, partly because it was the beginning of the year and I didn't like the symbolic implications. But even before that all went to crap, I was already feeling ugh about resolutions. This line is worth a copy/paste:

I decided not to make any New Year's Resolutions this year because last year I had one, ONE, and I did not fulfill it in the least. (I went to my doctor the week before Christmas, the first time I'd been since the week before Christmas 2010, and when the nurse weighed me she said, "Oh! You've lost a pound!" Fail.)

Then after it all went to crap, Mindy Kaling emerged as more than just that baby crazy chick from The Office and she changed everyone's life. Go buy and read her book now if you haven't!

2012: I made no resolutions for 2013.

And even though my heart was crushed this year, I'm kind of amazed at how productive it actually was.
  • I tried and failed at a career change then got back in the saddle and killed it.

  • I joined My Fitness Pal in July and stuck to the plan to lose 15 pounds in three months then killed that too and lost 30 instead.
  • I finally launched the business I've been dreaming about since that very first post, District Peach
  • I learned Microsoft Excel. This is huge, y'all. 
  • OH! And I negotiated with Comcast and got my cable back for less than I was paying for basic channels after a year of living cable free! 

So maybe the key is to not make any resolutions? Or maybe I lost sight of the point of resolutions?

All I know is I've got some momentum going, and I'm going to ride that wave as long as it lasts. So, for 2014, here's what I'm thinking:

Learn French. I've already started using Memrise, a free online tool that's a much more productive time-suck thank Buzzfeed, to do this. Je voudrais du vin, s'il vous plait. Translation: I'm all ready for a trip to Paris! (Please send donations.)

Learn how to sew. I already have a sewing machine I inherited from my Great Aunt Martha, and learning how to upholster furniture will be important for my business. I see lots of injuries in the future.

Or that.
Finally master Claire de Lune.

I have a piano in my tiny apartment, y'all. I have played it about five times in the past year, and it's time to put it to better use. Besides, I've been wanting to learn this most beautiful piece of music for 10 years now so...

See Britney in Vegas. Self-explanatory.

Until next year...c'est la vie!

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