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Emmys 2012: Someone Is Getting Paid Too Much

Sep 24, 2012

I guess I have to start watching "Homeland" now. It beat "Mad Men," "Game of Thrones," "Downton Abbey," and "Breaking Bad" for Best Drama. BREAKING BAD?!?!?!?!

My solace in this is that Maggie Smith won Best Supporting Actress in a Drama Series, because the Dowager Countess of Grantham might be the best character on TV.

"What is a week end?"

Also, "The Amazing Race" is apparently better than "Project Runway." I'm just not understanding.

Therefore, let's talk fashion to get our minds off of this craziness.

Looks I Loved:

1) Julia Louis Dreyfus in Vera Wang


The cut and draping are understated, elegant, age appropriate (that's key).



 2) Julianne Hough in Georges Hobeika Couture


One of my favorite colors, and what a nice homage to summer, don't you think? Love the petal detailing on the bottom of the dress.

3) Michelle Dockery in Louis Vuitton


If anyone knows how difficult it is to make pale skin work, it's me. Michelle is wearing the perfect colors to make her skin look creamy instead of washed out. The slate gray sheer top is genius.


4) Nicole Kidman in Antonio Berardi

I want this dresss! I love a little sparkle (we'll get to that in a minute), and this is such an unexpected way to do that.

5) Sarah Hyland in Marchesa

While I think she's a little young for this look (at 22 I would have gone with something more fun), it is really dreamy and romantic.

6) Jane Krakowski in Franco Kaufman


I love how these sequins make the dress look like it's made of a fine metal. The head-to-toe glitz is not overpowering, which is challenging to pull off.  

7) Sofia Vergara in Zuhair Murad


My favorite look of the evening. Sofia looks amazing, and this dress is a show-stopper.

Looks I Am Not Understanding:

1) Ariel Winter in Katharine Kidd dress and Brian Atwood shoes


I know prints are in, but what is going on here? The train is atrocious, the cut is unflattering, her hair is all wrong, and those shoes...ugh, they make her feet look ginormous!

2) Elisabeth Moss in Dolce & Gabbana


First of all, I find it interesting that "Mad Men" co-stars Elisabeth and January (below) traded hair colors. Bad move, ladies. Second of all, another hideous print. And the ruffles. And those shoes that I'm pretty sure I wore in 1995 when I represented my middle school in a public speaking contest (can't remember the subject of my speech, but I did say "hellish" and was really pleased that I got away with saying a bad word in front of adults). Elisabeth, your body is tiny and you're single now. Get with the program.

3) January Jones in Zac Posen


Not that anyone is suprised that January looks deranged at a classy event, but the hair makes me so sad. That mousy blonde is not working, and the slicked back/hairsprayed 'do is so disappointing. Some stylist is getting paid way too much.

4) Julianne Moore in Christian Dior


Julianne, you are not old enough to wear whatever you want and laugh about it on the red carpet! Lose the long sleeves, get a necklace if you're going to wear something that tight on top, and please do not ever wear this much yellow again.

5) Kerry Washington in Vivienne Westwood


Is it just me or does this look like something someone on my high school drill team would have worn to homecoming? This is what we call Glitter Gone Wrong. Granted, it's not terrible, but I feel like Kerry threw this on 10 minutes before the show. This is exacerbated with her sad, frizzy hairdo. Seriously, who are these people paying to do their hair?!

6) Lucy Liu in Versace


Not as bad as the previous glitter bomb, but only because Lucy is at least trying. The neckline is so weird, not to mention she basically looks like a disco queen going to war. I'm not feeling it.

7) Lena Dunham in something horrendous


Lena, we get it -- you're fat, tortured, and brilliant. Can we please move on? You're making a lot of money now, which means you don't have to be the ugly girl anymore. Stop hating yourself more than most people hate themselves (that's a direct quote), and please grow out your hair ASAP. I can't believe you chopped it off. UGH.

*Editor's Note: I am all about the unexpected heroine being a "normal" looking woman, but it's like Lena Dunham wants us to call her ugly. It's really starting to make me angry.

Things that Made Me Forget about How Much Lena Dunham is Annoying Me:

1) Edie Falco is 49.

2) Heid Klum's shoes.



3) Kevin Costner.




4) This tweet: @ jimmykimmel : Just opened a beer using Jon Hamm’s chin! #emmys

3 comments:

  1. I had the same thought this morning - that I guess I need to check out Homeland Security now, mostly just because it beat Breaking Bad, though I love Mad Men too.

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  2. Great post! Reading this made me laugh so much. I couldn't agree more. (And I thought the same thing about Edie Falco...she looks younger than she did on The Sopranos!)

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  3. I actually said "ugh!" out loud when I scrolled down to Lena Dunham's picture. Why is she purposely making herself look dumpy and unattractive???

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