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Trendy Fall Hair FAIL (UPDATED with scary Ronald McDonald picture)

Sep 22, 2010

Recently I got the makeover itch again.  This happens at the turn of each season, and I usually dye my hair red when autumn hits.  This year I thought I'd mix it up and do a chocolatey brown, like this:

(I may have also thought I would instantly look like Katie Holmes.  I'd even settle for Suri.)

Instead, this is what I now look like:
(I secretly like this picture because my eyes look big.)

Okay, so my hair doesn't look that bad, but it is on fire in the sunlight.  Here's what happened. 

Last Friday night I still looked normal, except I had roots, so it was time to take care of that situation.  I don't pay for hair color in a salon because I used to work in a salon and never paid for anything, and I therefore was spoiled and shocked when I found out how much other people paid.  So now I buy Garnier Nutrisse dye and do it myself.  This past summer I got brave and gave myself highlights, and I did a pretty good job if I do say so myself. 

For fall my gut told me to go back to my roots (literally) and do a rich brown, maybe adding some highlights later on if it got too boring.  I also planned on asking Carol from Bang to give my bangs.  I decided all this soon after watching "(500) Days of Summer."  Terrible movie, great hair. 

Zooey Deschanel
Other trendy girls rockin' the look:

Katy Perry, who I'm sure looks pretty without any makeup on.

Lea Michele -- although I do not want to be as skinny as she is. Eek! Eat a slushie Rachel!

The aforementioned Katie Holmes.

So all this was my inspiration.  And that Marie Claire magazine cover kind of pushed me over the edge. I'd made up my mind -- I was going to be a brunette again.

Then on Friday I had three separate people in three separate situations tell me that my hair color was amazing and I shouldn't ever change it.  But I had roots, so I had to do something.  And I really wanted to go brown, but I was getting all this flattery over my red.  What's a girl to do?!

The next night I stood in the hair care aisle of Rite-Aid perplexed.  I finally settled on Clairol Natural Instincts Raspberry Creme, because Garnier Nutrisse was out of reds.  Gotta keep the fans happy.  (Yes, that is really why I went with red.  I am that full of myself where my hair is concerned.)

Now, I've been dyeing my hair since I was in the 5th grade, so I know how long it takes to cover rootage and change hair color.  The answer is 25-30 minutes.  So I was kind of taken aback when I noticed on the instructions that I was only supposed to leave the color on for 10 minutes.  By the time I realized this it had been about 20.  I quickly hopped in the shower so as not to ruin my hair.  I turned on the water and stood under the shower head for five solid minutes.  Bright orange -- I'm talking neon from 1985 -- washed down the drain the entire time.  I was too afraid to look when I got out of the shower.  I just dried off and blow dried my hair, and then I took a glance in the mirror. 


No seriously, I looked like that clown from "IT."  Straight out of a horror movie.  And to make matters worse, I had on no makeup, and in my bathroom's terrible lighting I also looked like I was on the verge of death.  With Ronald McDonald hair. 

Scary picture added at the request of Sam
(You WILL have nightmares about this tonight.)

Once Margaret dyed her hair Elvyra black, and I gave her my honest evaluation after all her friends and coworkers had blatantly lied to her: "Duuuuuuuuuuuude.  Get that fixed immediately."

I was hoping she'd show me the same respect.  Instead she said, "It's not that bad!" Then she proceeded to circle me, inspecting the pumpkin colored, frizzy mass on my pale, washed out head.  And then she started snickering behind my back.  And then the truth came.  "We don't have to go to dinner tonight, I feel bad." 


So I ran across the street to Rite-Aid and got the chocolatey brown my gut had told me to get, by Garnier.  And yes, I dyed my hair twice in one night.  And I found out when you mix Neon with Normal you get still fiery but not nightmare-inducing red.  And Carol is probably going to laugh at me again. 


  1. I like the "big eyes" picture too!

  2. For the record, tho I don't know what it looked like before, I think it looks fab now! And I am amazed that it is so shiny and glossy after dying twice in one night.

    I totally dye out of the box as well. More money for shoes!

  3. I've had 2 bad hair color experiences and I've finally learned my lesson and now only get blonde highlights. I actually really like the color your hair is in this pic you posted, but I would have loved to see a pic of the orange! :) I used to always get my hair colored when a celebrity looked amazing and I would decide I had to have her hair because then I would miraculously look like her. Oh, and I died my hair dark brown once because I knew my boyfriend liked brunettes.. I know :-/

  4. I have also secretly wanted Katie Holmes' hair...but its not so cool to say "I want my hair to look like Katie Holmes" to my hair colorist-lol! Anyway I tried the red, but it won't stay past two days :( now I'm a brunette with small highlights, but maybe next month when I go for my roots, I may just do the Katie "do" (since I'm not the only one who likes her hair-lol)by the way Love your hair!

  5. I just busted out laughing in a State Department briefing. Dude, have SO been there.

  6. @Sassy Marmalade: Yes to the more money for shoes! We think alike, my friend.

    @Sam: I colored my hair for a boy earlier this year. Now that I think about it, that's the second time this year I haven't gone with my gut. NEVER AGAIN! And since you asked, I'll consider posting a pic of the orange. Yes, there are pictures.

    @Crystal: You have that lovely Katie Holmes skin tone to match -- do it!

    @floridagirlindc: What are you doing reading this nonsense in a State briefing?! Crazy girl! (I can't say I blame you, though.)

  7. YAY! haha, i love that pic! your hair definitely was orange! Too bad Halloween is still a month off, you could have kept it for the occasion! :)

  8. thanks, don't be fooled though- I tan (my boyfriend makes fun of me-he says I'm the must be the only Mexican who tans in the tanning bed)-LOL! BTW, I don't think I introduced myself, I went to high school w/ Meghan Orton (now-Meyer. She posted one of your blogs on her FB and I went to it and I am. Very interesting stuff :)

  9. Nice meeting you Crystal! Thanks for reading and glad you like it! :) Megan is sorely missed here, my adventures aren't quite as fun without her.

  10. I have absolutely done this.. attempted to go auburn and somehow resulted in Pippi Longstocking fiery red. I immediately booked it for the local CVS.

  11. So glad its fixed dear, but it wasn't terrible that Sunday morning. I still trust you to color my hair!

  12. Hello, big eyes. You are so entertaining! And you look you!!!! Guess what. I have a hair stylist these days.. and good thing because of grey..I became allergic to hair dye, but she manges to color my hair without the chemicals touching. Soon. Thinking of you fondly. Denise

  13. I'm getting my hair colored this weekend and I change my mind every 5 minutes about WHAT color. I always do red, and I love it, but it fades so fast. I'm pretty blonde right now from the summer sun, so I thought I might just take that all the way, but I know in my heart I'm too lazy to be a fake blonde and I would wind up with roots 4 inches long. So, I am now considering a mix of blonde highlights and red lowlights over a brown base color, but I'm afraid I'm going to wind up looking like a tortoiseshell cat.

  14. To paraphrase everyone's favorite Millionaire Matchmaker, pick a color. I think your fears are well-founded. Highlights are better for summer anyway -- what about trying a rich, chocolatey brown, like I attempted and utterly failed at?