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Breaking Up Is Hard to Do

Aug 28, 2010

So apparently this is how I deal with a break-up:

Step 1: Call him to see how's he's doing. Start crying after he says "fine" then asks how I am doing. Hang up immediately.

Step 2: Go to dinner with a friend at an expensive restaurant, only to find she has also broken up with her boyfriend. Spend dinner fighting back tears and telling one another we are fabulous.

Step 3: Go to dinner with another friend at the restaurant he loved the best. Sit at the bar and make friends with the bartender. Tell bartender whole story. Bartender feels bad for me and offers free drinks. Bartender suggests I text him. I text him. He makes fun of me and immediately accuses me of being drunk -- WHICH I WASN'T (I know my limits, okay?!).

Step 4: Go to dinner with another single friend and discuss birthing options (since my sister and her cousin just had babies).  Decide either your stomach or the other part of you being ripped apart is not for us and since 30 is the recommended age to freeze your eggs we should just do that and have a surrogate.  Unfortunately I haven't been preparing financially for this, so I resign myself to the fact I will be childless.

Step 5: Go back to the restaurant with the Bartender and update Bartender on the situation. Bartender recommends deleting him from my phone immediately. I do not heed Bartender's recommendation. Later take a text from him as an invitation to call. He tells me, while it's good to talk to me, he has moved on and is not interested.  Hang up immediately.

Step 6: Go to baseball game with friends to get mind off of situation. Instead end up talking about situation entire night. Does not make me feel better.

Step 6: Organize girls' night, as it is exactly one week since break-up and I SHOULD BE OVER THIS ALREADY!!!

That's all I got. 

Seriously, I haven't handled a break-up this poorly since I was 19. I think some speed dating is order. Self-reflecting will only make this worse, so I'm gonna go ahead and skip that.

At least I have clean hair. That's positive, right?


  1. So sorry to hear about your breakup. I've been there and done that re texting an ex. It's trite, but it will get easier. Just cry, drink, spend time with your girls like you're doing tonight and organize everything. Thinking of you...xoxo

  2. Thank you, City Girl. :) Girls' night was so much fun, just what I needed. What would we do without each other?!

  3. Clean hair = definitely a step in the right direction. :o) Also, you're self-aware so you realize what's up. (I bet 19 year old you hadn't quite caught onto things.)

    A little wallowing is totally fine! Cry, write about it, enjoy a bottle of wine. I like to indulge in a little Sex in the City, Gilmore Girls, etc. Just don't let yourself spend more time thinking about him than you spent with him. No guy is worth that -- especially for a beautiful person such as yourself.

    Keep your chin up. Like City Girl said, it will get easier. [Insert virtual, not creepy, hug here.] (I swear, not creepy!)

  4. What you need is some really good Man-Hating music. Ask Jamie F for her copies. I sent her 4 volumes a while ago - she loved them! Hang in there and remember why it's so fun to be single.

  5. I feel your pain! You know all girls have been there once or twice. This is just the messy part, before you get to the got-my-shit-together part. In the meantime, I just posted my cure-all marg recipe that is totally perfect for situations just like these. Hope you get to enjoy the holiday weekend!

  6. DC is a wonderful city to break up --in , because around the corner is another guy. Having an attitude and laughing is the best way to find someone new!

  7. You ladies give the BEST advice! Thank you all for your comments!