I've been feeling a little run down lately (possibly picked up a dog disease from kissing Noli on the lips...I'm looking into it), so I decided to take a sick day. Unlike some people (MEGAN!), I do not feel bad about taking a day away from work to recuperate and recharge. I usually do feel like I'm getting away with something, though, like I'm back in high school and I convince my mother to let me stay home because my eyes are puffy (true story!). But when my supervisor e-mailed: "Load up on soaps and 'Jon and Kate: Twisted Fate'!" I knew I was in the clear.
I began my day watching "Web Soup." This is a variation of "The Soup," but it's with the guy from "Singled Out" (oh how I wish that show were still around) and it's all Web videos. I didn't think I'd enjoy it, but it was entertaining enough to keep me awake. Here's a sampling of my faves from today's show:
Japanese Dog Exercises
Vending Machine Flipping Idiot (beware, this will make you cringe)
Elephant Eats Poo (beware, this is ten times worse than the flipping idiot)
I considered closing my eyes, but then the "E! True Hollywood Story: Cults, Religion, and Mind Control" came on and that was a no-brainer -- I was staying awake. My air conditioning had been making a gurgling noise for a couple of days, and around this time it died. I had put in a work order for it the day before, but no one had come yet. I fought to watch the entire THS because it was sooooooo freaky, but in the middle of one girl's account of being forced to marry her first cousin when she was 14, I passed out from heat exhaustion.
When I awoke the temperature in my apartment had surpassed 80 degrees, so I called the front office and they promised to send someone within the next two hours. I poured myself a glass of iced tea and flipped channels. "Jon and Kate" was on, but after this season's premiere I decided to boycott TLC altogether and write them a letter telling them why I was doing so. The letter, which I have yet to actually write but have composed in my head, goes something like this:
I am appalled that you are perpetuating the demise of the Gosselins. I will not be a part of it and have henceforth decided to discontinue my viewership of your programming. Your ratings may be good now, but once this season is over there will be no more Jon and Kate, and then where will you be? Shame on you. Do the right thing and pull the show.
You may be thinking, 'She will buckle and watch the show, or at least 'What Not to Wear,' because who can resist 'What Not to Wear'?' Sadly, I can get all the updates I need from US Weekly and People, and the Style network has "How Do I Look?", which I admit is not as good as "What Not To Wear," but it will fulfill my need to watch a makeover.
Hoping you'll make the right choice because I really love the Duggars as well (but can get updates on their Web site),
(Funny...I now have put my thoughts in writing but have still not sent it to TLC. Obviously I won't be leading a revolution anytime soon.)
TV was boring me, so I logged onto stepheniemeyer.com to read "Midnight Sun," the unfinished Edward Cullen version of "Twilight." The series really is addicting, and I'm sad I jumped on the bandwagon so late because I missed out on all the obsessing over Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart and their secret non-love affair. I'm also bummed that I saw the movie first, because I have a feeling my imagination would have thought up the most gorgeous guy ever, but now I have Robert Pattinson stuck in my head. Oh well, he is hot enough I suppose. BTW, Kristen Stewart is SO AWKWARD. Get a grip, Kristen!!! Since I'm going off on a "Twilight" tangent, I should direct you to two videos that I can't stop watching:
Andy Samberg movie compilation
Andy Samberg's "New Moon" trailer
So anyway, I was deep in the woods of In-Love-With-A-Vampire Land when I heard a knock on the door. Vampire or Maintenance Man? Either one was way exciting. Except when I opened the door they had sent the creepiest maintenance guy possible. He always tries to pet my dog, who is an idiot and runs to him, and then he looks at me, grins, and sticks his tongue out. *shudder* And since it was a sick day I was still in my PJs and had no bra on. I didn't want him to think any of that was any sort of invitation, so I huddled on my sofa and checked my work e-mail, hoping he would see I was working and would leave me alone.
I had about 200 news alerts (since my job is to monitor news), and as I sorted through them I realized I was really hungry. "Thai woman dies in blast"...mmm, Thai food. "Turkey, Iraq sign military deal"...mmm, turkey. "2 Koreas hold rare talks amid nuclear tension"...mmm, Korean food. Wait, what? I must be starving to want Korean food, yuck! "Crashed Indian military plane found near China border"...mmm Indian food...oh yum I actually have Indian food! I waited impatiently for Creepy Maintenance Man to finish up so I could leave the couch and head to the refrigerator which held lots of catered Indian food care of Ashmi who had brought home leftovers from a graduation party last weekend. After taking a smoking break and saturating my apartment with cigarette toxins, he finally got the AC working and left.
After a very satisfying lunch, I noticed the sun had come out (we've had thunderstorms every day for a straight month), so I got really really brave and put on a bikini. I bought a one-piece this year to cover the excess flab, but my white stomach has been freaking me out. I figured no one would be at the pool in the middle of a workday, so I was safe. Once at the pool, I put a pink float in the water, hopped on, and un-did my bikini top so as not to get a weird tan line. Before I pushed off the side I grabbed the book I'm reading between "Twilight" and "New Moon" (which still hasn't gotten here! Amazon has some 'splaining to do!) and set off into the sun. About five minutes into it I heard a loud PLOP! and looked over. Low and behold, I was not the only one who thought it would be safe to venture out today -- 8 Months Pregnant Lady in a String Bikini had just walloped into the water, her husband staring adoringly at her nearby. I glanced at my less than perfect stomach and suddenly felt very thin.
Soon another thunderstorm rolled in, so I gathered my things and ran inside, just missing the rain. I stopped by my mailbox -- no "New Moon," but I had ordered "Twilight" the movie on Netflix, and there it was! Back up at the apartment, my roomie for the summer, Mary, was making some yummy pasta. She made me a plate and we popped in "Twilight." All in all, I'd say my sick day was pretty successful.
On another note, many of you have expressed concern that I'm running off Humanitarian. I have a feeling it's because his name is "Humanitarian" and therefore you are all sympathizing with him. So, I hereby change his name to "Captain Can't Follow Through." If anyone can find positive connotation in that then I will surrender and ask him out.